Counting Days

27 Days to SPM ...
Oh my god, im gonna freak. I cant' sit still. I cant read. Everytime I try to sit down and memorize the damned sentences. Everything just go blank in my mind. And every single words I read dont make sense to me. I will just re-read and then re-read and then read the same sentence again, forgetting the purpose of 'why-am-doing-this' I am really really going insane. Can I just do something to shut my brain from the outside world? oh god.. please.. I wish that pulling out strands of my hair will help now. And then again, i already try everything i can think of to keep me awake.
I will eat... thanks for PILING UP my weight. and then, i'll drink coffee. you see, caffeine dont make much difference to me now. Okay, i admit this. I even smoked weed, of course that keep me awake. But i was obvilously too high to do anything that moment.
Oh fuckkkkk..... im just in so deep now.
im going to really screwed everything up.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

ok... lets chill......
breathe in.. breathe out.
sigh...
CAN SOMEONE TELL ME THAT IM GONNA BE OKAY??

ok... i cant hear anything.

but then , i know the trip going to kl will DO me FINE......
well at least i get to go to kl and you dont.
............
to think of it, i really have a big preassure about winning the contest though. I meant i had spend rm 400 for the air fare and then the ywca only promised to sponsered rm160 for me.. now, if i lost the contest??
I AM GONNA LOST THE RM240 as welllllllllllllllllll...!!!
Darn it, i've gotta win the fucking contest.

what are you smirking at?
think i cant do it?
well, I AM GONNA SHOW YOU.
just look out for my next blog. :P