i was about 7 years old and had never swam before as my mum was terrified of pools and lakes, and would never let me swim. our friend had a pool and i decided it was about time i swam in one. Without my mum knowing i went over to her house to use it. my friends mum looked at me and said, "Do you know how to swim?" "Of course," i lied, "I'm 7." "Ok then," she replied," Just be careful." and off to the pool I went, alone.

not knowing what to do, i figured the best way was to just dive in. so into the deep end of the pool i jumped and almost immediately after hitting water, i started to drown.

the strangest thing was, it was in complete and utter slow motion and i remember seeing the bubbles form around me as my arms flung around in panic. then everything seemed to stop
and i thought in crystal clear terms, if i don't do something, if i don't try to swim, i'm going to die.

i started to move my arms and legs together, and started to swim to the surface. once i did
surface, i started to gasp for air and swam to the ledge of the pool then i climbed out. i felt so proud. i had learned to swim.i rested for awhile, gathering breath and strength, then jumped back in to practice my new found talent. this time, however, i went in the shallow end.

"That sums up your life pretty well," chris said to me after i told him my swimming story. "Just diving in and doing whatever it takes to survive."

"I suppose so," i said back, not really thinking that what i had done was anything much, in fact, i thought it was perhaps a little bit stupid. but then i thought about it for a minute and said to him "I guess even then I had the belief that I can get through anything if I just try it - even if it scares the bejesus out of me, or even if it's the hardest thing in the world. I never think failure is possible. I know that sounds really Little House on the Prarie'ish, but that's just how I see it."

i've done a lot of things just because i had the urge to, and i've failed a lot or looked like a complete ass on more than one occasion. but at least I can say i've tried this or that and here i am to prove it. and to have that kind of freedom to try makes a few minutes of fear, panic or stress worth it. beause living in fear is not living, is it?